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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Spclk187's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, August 21st, 2003
3:32 pm
nothing
what up yall? Spcl-k here with a news brief.....actually there is no news, still no word about megan and i'm begining to lose faith in "us" getting back together...so I dunno. I went to the Freddy vs Jason movie sneak peak last tuesday (8/12), and then again friday and again this coming friday (tomorrow). That is a a fucking wicked good movie and i highly recomend everyone to go and see it, it is well put together, Holy Shit!!! n*e wayz, gotta go keep ya posted, and sorry gone so long (even though no 1 reads these things)
peace,
spclk187

spclk's wurdz of wizdumb: "never confuse your belly button with your butthole"

Current Mood: high
Monday, August 11th, 2003
9:09 pm
not a damn thing
what is up i am so bored!! and me not having a women is driving me fucking crazy! i hate being alone!! I want to be with "my nigga cris" but i don't see that happening, so i'll wait for "the one" gotta go

spclk's wordz of wizdum: "If you have large testicles dont' ride a bull at the rodeo" -me

p.s. My "nigga cris" is the one and only megan

Current Mood: lonely
Monday, July 28th, 2003
9:08 pm
HOLA
Well hello everyone! I am back to enlighten you on my lovely life, me and my father hate each other! ain't that great! I really don't care, Me and Megan are talking on a regular basis now :-) I'm kinda starting to like her again, even though the feelings never went away! g2g write more later\
peace,
spclk187

spclk's words of wisdom: Don't ride a skateboard if you only have one leg!

Current Mood: chipper
Friday, July 25th, 2003
8:51 pm
I've been gone for quite some time, now it's time to put things in line. I am happy i have reconciled with most of my "enemies" even though we didn't really hate each other, and i'm happy, like one of those mood's where you "happy to be alive" things you know? but one thing is eating me up inside, i need to find someone to "be with" you know like a girl/women whatever, other than that i am good and i should be writting more now so til then "love yourself and others around you" -some dude

words of wisdom: "don't play leap frog with a unicorn"
-me, spcl~k

Current Mood: cheerful
Monday, June 30th, 2003
8:43 pm
nothing special
i'm bored as hell and i have nothing to do, i am free from all womens evil and it feels great, i may have a new g/f but i don't know, thats it, i'm gonna go so peace the fuck out
and to all my ex's "ha ha ha, you don't know what your missing out on"

spclk187

Current Mood: chipper
Thursday, January 2nd, 2003
1:27 pm
well hello everyone, it's spclk here, i got some news, i'm about to start working on my studio with my homeboy brandon aka zyonide, this is for megan, if you read this my new email addy is spclkndazylim@yahoo.com noone but me knows about this email address so email me cuz i need to talk to you,
peace
spclk187,
i'm out

Current Mood: high
Monday, December 30th, 2002
2:36 pm
Damn, i'm still kinda tired from last night, me and zach were out skating until 5 am!!! filming and shit, you know how that is. I loce crystal, and nothing or noone will make me break up with her

Current Mood: good
Wednesday, November 27th, 2002
10:16 am
To Those
this is part of one of my new songs: To those who fuck wit me imma fuck with you, try to run up on me and i sprayed your crew, push that shit on me standin next to pikichu, tell me who the fuck are you? thats a little taste, i go into the studio next month and start on my cd, and let me tell ya, it's a lot of anger towards some punk ass scandalous people, so if ya wanna know towards who (most can guess) be on the look out for it meg. Corupt One productions forever, love to all the members of the C-one family: Zyonide and ANGL of L.C.S (brandon and Tristin) Blinke- BEN Denim and every one else

Current Mood: accomplished
Sunday, August 11th, 2002
10:15 pm
back to basics
well there is this girl that wants to go out with me really bad, and i put it off until i got a response from megan about us going back out, well i im'd her not too long ago and she had jorge or "whore-hey" im me back and talk some mad shit when i don't even know the cocksucker, well now i think i'm gonna go out with this person cuz megan won't respond and she lets people run all over her, when she says she don't like this person cuz he's controling, and she hated when people did that to me, she said i was her "FRIEND" but now i'm starting to think it was a load of bullshit!

and where does this mother fucker come off telling me that he's gonna beat my ass? talking shit when he don't know me? what a self absorbing norrow minded prick

Current Mood: pissed off
Tuesday, July 23rd, 2002
11:32 am
KORN!!
whats up ya'll i just got back from the korn concert, and let me tell you it was fucking awesome, puddle of mudd was the shit too. it's been a long time since i've talked to good ol' meg, and to let you know i kind of miss it, well not kind of i miss her a lot, but what can i do? just sit and hope for the best i guess :-) well i'm gonna go and umm...get drunk just like every other night!
peace,
k

Current Mood: drained
Tuesday, July 9th, 2002
12:23 pm
this is my feelings toward meg right now,

Still Loving you:
Not a day goes by that i stop loving you,
Even though you probably hate me I still love you,
There is no stop to my feelings,
Ever since i've been apart from you,
I feel so blue,
Your stuck in my mind like crazy glue,
Even when you love someone else,
I will still love you,
I wish you would think it through,
Then you will see that we are a set of two,
No one in this world can stop me from loving you,
It is you who I will always pursue,
We will be married and live happily,
This I can promise you,
There will always be obstacles in the way,
We can over come them and they will not stay,
Give it time and they will be in the shade,
We will be in color one day,
Then family and enemies,
will be grey,
While WE live in joy and them in dismay

Current Mood: weird
Thursday, June 27th, 2002
11:34 pm
change...
Now is the time for me to change, After talking to Megan, she kind knocked some fuckin sense into me. I need to stop taking so much shit from people (even if i get my ass beat, i'll hold my ground). Plus if i want any kind of shot to get back with her i need to change, and thats exactly what i'm gonna do. After hearing her talk tonight it makes me wanna change, stand up for my girl (hopefully soon it'll be meg again) and quite being an asshole and a little pussy bitch like i was, and do something about it, so meg this is for you! Another thing (truth) she pointed out is that my friends aren't real friends at all, and she was right, they fuckin' pissed me off tonight, the little bastards ditched me at the skatepark and went home, so fuck them motherfuckers!! they can lick my left fucking nut, megan was true to me in the past as well as tonight! As long as i have her i don't need them motherfuckers, jordan and his rainbow wearing, gap tooth dyke ass girl! THE TIME OF CHANGE IS NOW, so fuck all of you motherfuckers who walked over me in the past, like jordan, fina, and every other last mother fucker, no one will stand in my way now, meg you'll be home again soon you know what i mean (back with me hopefully), and i love you!
spclK 1-8-7

Current Mood: pissed off
Monday, June 17th, 2002
10:45 am
tHiNkInG!!
i'm gonna give megan a little bit to figure out if she wants me or not, if i don't get an answer pretty soon i'm gonnna get a new girlfriend, i just heard that the guy she has now is kinda controlling but that ain't my business so i'll leave it alone and let her deal with it unless she asks for my help. well i'm gonnna go now, so peace

Current Mood: contemplative
Monday, June 10th, 2002
11:51 pm
i'm sitting here doing nothing but thinking about my whole life w/o megan, so the healing process begins, don't get me wrong i'd drop everything for her still, i still love her to death! i just sit and hope this bullshit blows over, (shit that should of never happened in the first place,and i'm still pissed for!)..smoke brb....ok, now the rest of the truth comes out; Megan says she never wants to hear my voice again, but what i wouldn't do for that one last chance, to make you happy, just think of all the times we shared together, that should count for something, i guess i'm trying to say i can't live without you, even though you can live without me.

thinking of you makes me weak,
all i want is you to speak,
i still love you with all my heart,
and it pierces my body like a steel tip dart,
i can't stand for us to be apart,
i wish we could have a brand new start,
i'll die to be with you,
i think of us as a team of two,
it is all in perfect view,
I hope you will get the clue,
I only want to be with you.

just think about that meg, i love you still even though you have no place for me in your heart anymore, so contact me somehow, day or night call or email.
p.s. you can still go to kmk with me if you want :o)
i'm out,
spclk187

Current Mood: restless
Thursday, June 6th, 2002
11:05 pm
just sitting here alone, getting sadder by the minute, needing a cigarette badly, but not having the motovation to get up. wondering why megan won't talk to me, i'm still in love with her, but i don't know how to tell her, cuz she is too caught up with someone else, please won't someone take my life?!!

Current Mood: sad
12:18 am
i am nothing
i'm just sitting here alone, doing nothing, thats because i am nothing!! HA! While megan is probably having fun with Jorge i'm isolated in my own little hell with noone but myself :-( oh well, you kind of get used to it after awhile. It kind of makes me wonder: does she ever think of "us" or me in general?? well i'll probably write more here in a little bit,
peace,
spclk187

Current Mood: rejected
Wednesday, June 5th, 2002
11:44 pm
.......
I am sitting here, literally crushed, one day it seems that megan is contimplating getting back together with me and the next she won't answer her phone when i call, and when i do get through there is some dude answering her phone, it's all too confusing. so here is a poem, after all it is what i do best.

I Wanna Know

I wanna know are there feelings still there?
I wanna know do you still care?
I wanna know if there is emotions that we still share?
I wanna feel her gentle skin bare,
I wanna tell her i still care,
I wanna love her again before there's nothing there,
I miss the touch of her lips,
I just want one last kiss,
To fill my heart with sentimental bliss.....

Current Mood: crushed
1:37 am
thinkin'
i'm just sitting here thinking to myself, all of a sudden meg hates me, or maybe she just needs time away from me>? i dunno, i still love her so much though, my emotions are about to spill i'm just so damn confused, i don't know whether she wants to be with me or without me!! can someone answer me that question? damn it, i'm so pissed at myself, only if i was a better person, i wish i was dead!! forreal!! only if i had my best friend here with me (jack daniels) everything would be ok but it's not, i'm gonna try to call her again before i go to sleep. FUCK i need a newport!! oh well only time will tell what happens to me, so put away your sun glasses cuz it don't look to bright :*(

Current Mood: blank
Tuesday, May 28th, 2002
11:22 pm
i am tired as hell!! i only got 3.5 hours of sleep last night!!i went to bed at 3:30 and got up at 7 so i am kinda tired right now!i just wish my sweet heart megan was here to sleep with me, that is if she would :o( but yea i'm gonna go call her in a few minutes now so yea,
peace,
k

Current Mood: sleepy
Monday, May 20th, 2002
12:13 am
looking forward
well i don't like the look of this summer, without megan and all, i still love her so much and i don't call her that much anymore because i don't know if she even love me so it's all boggling in my head right now, so i think i'm going to write a free verse poem here it goes:

all the thoughts in my head,
only thing i can do is sit here w/o you in my bed,

loving only you,
wishing you'd love me too,

now your love is gone,
and i am still quite fond,

life is just a blur,
ever since i lost her,

my thoughts just race,
hoping to see her face,

there you go that was made in like five minutes so how you like that! that is how i let out my emotions so yea! ha! well i'm gonna go back to watching my VG19 (for those stupid fucks who don't know it's a rollerblading video!) peace out,
megan i still love you!!

Current Mood: lonely
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